ARTIFICIAL
by AndThenIDied
Summary: When Shinji is contacted by his father's secretive company, NERV, his life is changed forever. Kawoshin. android!kaworu.
1. Chapter 1

**Notes: This is loosely based off the movie ex machina...because...I really like the idea of kaworu being an android okay? Haha but when I say LOOSELY I mean LOOSELY. More notes at the end.**

 ***Disclaimer: I do not own Evangelion**

 **ARTIFICIAL**

"Shinji Ikari."

Shinji froze in his footsteps, causing multiple people to bump into his back and grumble at him on the busy city street. He didn't recognize the voice behind him.

"Shinji Ikari?" The mystery woman tried again, this time a little less sure of herself. Shinji turned around to face a young woman, her face seemed kind and she looked visibly relieved when he turned around. Shinji furrowed his brow, _I don't recognize this lady._

"Um, yes?" He glanced around nervously. _She must have the wrong person._ Despite the fact that she was looking directly at him and called out his name. A sea of people continued to steadily move past the two of them. "I'm sorry…do I know you?"

"Are you busy?" The woman asked, taking a step toward him. It wasn't threatening or anything but Shinji couldn't help but flinch back. _What does she want?_

"I'm-I'm on my way to school…"

"Great, so you're free then." She excitedly grasped Shinji's wrist and tugged him in her direction, all while spinning around and nearly skipping away. "Your father sent me for you."

 _Father?_ Shinji's eyes widened and he tried to pull his arm away but couldn't against the woman's grip. "Hey, wait, my father? I don't even know you! Who are you? Where are we going?!"

* * *

The car bumped along the small cracks in the cement road, bubbly pop music flowed softly from the speakers. They were on the outskirts of the city now and traffic was thin. The woman driving, Misato Katsuragi, tapped a polished finger to the beat distractedly. Shinji tugged on his seat belt as if it were constricting him and looked out the window. Apparently she really had been sent for him by his father, but she refused to tell him for what exactly until they got to where they needed to be.

 _Misato said something about NERV._

The company was like a distant relative to Shinji. He vaguely remembered it while not remembering it at the same time. _Like father._

"Ms. Katsuragi—"

"Misato's fine."

"…. Misato…I think I should call the school to tell them I won't be coming…"

"Don't worry, we've already taken care of it." She chirped, taking a sudden harsh turn onto a road that was mostly hidden by thick greenery. Shinji knocked his head against the window.

"Ah!" He rubbed at the bump forming on the side of his head. "Then what about my guardians, they should know—"

"Again, don't worry about it, NERV will take care of everything." Misato pressed on the gas and the car lurched forward. _Why can't she tell me anything?_ Shinji thought in frustration.

The road from here was a lot bumpier and Shinji was surprised that they didn't crash. In fact, he didn't understand how Misato saw the road at all. Tree roots and weeds sprouted from the thinnest cracks, shrouding the concrete in foliage.

Eventually they came upon a dirt road that was even harder to spot than the one they were on. Misato slowed the car to a more tolerable speed before turning. There was a tunnel over-grown with ivy at the end of it. Shinji's heart began to pound in his chest as they drove into it.

Misato parked, and for a moment everything was pitch black and silent. Shinji quietly wondered if his life was in danger. The moment he seized the seat belt the car suddenly lurched and they were sinking into the ground. Shinji froze, his shaking hands releasing the seat belt as he sat back. _What is this?_

The car was being lowered like it was on some kind of giant elevator. Bright lights lined the metal shoot they were being carried down. It was narrow, and Shinji didn't see much past the lights aside for walls that were lined with millions of thick wires. Misato dug through her pocket and took out an ID. It had her picture in the corner and NERV printed boldly at the top. The rest of the ID was filled with some personal information. She had showed the ID to Shinji before he'd gotten into the car with her.

Eventually they reached bottom and all movement stopped. Misato got out of the car and patiently waited for Shinji to do the same. Shinji still couldn't see much of where they were as he got out. He looked up to see sunlight impossibly high up. Misato pressed her card to a small rectangular object protruding out of the wall. A door that Shinji never noticed slid open then, to reveal a brightly lit corridor.

A girl was standing there waiting for them.

She looked to be about Shinji's age, but Shinji had never seen someone that looked quite like her. Her eyes were red, hair a strange pale blue color, and skin white as milk. And her expression looked as blank as a slate. Misato barely regarded the strange girl as she turned back to Shinji. "You coming, or are you just going to stand there ogling?" She teased. Shinji blushed furiously and followed her into the corridor.

The halls were long, and lined with so many doors that Shinji didn't understand how a room could possibly be behind all of them. Almost every single one had that strange rectangle outside of it that he'd seen Misato press her card to, and none of them had any door knobs. People walked around in white lab coats with NERV written on a square breast pocket. They all had their own IDs clipped to their shirts. They paid the trio very little attention as most of them looked like they were rushing off somewhere or going over extensive documents. The walls were bare except for the occasional poster. _NERV: leading the world into a smarter future_ they all read.

The girl leading them walked stiffly but swiftly. She hadn't said a word since he'd seen her. Shinji couldn't help but be curious. _What's a girl my age working here for?_

Eventually, they came to a door that had CONFERENCE ROOM printed into its middle. It was the only thing that separated it from every other one.

"He is waiting for you in here." The girl said, pressing her finger to what Shinji now called the "rectangle-thing". It blinked green, and Shinji wondered why the girl didn't have a card. The door slid open and Shinji stood frozen.

Misato urged him inside gently, tugging on his wrist again to get him inside. "Thank you, Rei." She said, and the door slid closed behind them.

The conference room looked like…well…a conference room. The walls were plain and there was a big round table in the center lined with rolling black chairs. At the head of the table sat a man, his hands neatly folded in front of his face.

 _Father._

"Shinji." Gendo Ikari said. "Take a seat."

* * *

It was hard to believe they were going even _further_ underground. The elevator was silent and awkward because it was just him and Rei. Shinji didn't have enough energy to try and start a conversation with her, and she didn't seem all that interested anyway. He was still reeling from the encounter with his father.

 _"You abandoned me, why should I do anything for you!?"_ The anger and tears had come out of nowhere. He trembled so hard he thought he might fall over. Misato watched from the side uncomfortably, her expression soft and sad.

Yet, despite that, here Shinji was. Doing what his father had asked. _It's because I'm weak._

 _AI…Artificial Intelligence…does such a thing even exist?_

Gendo didn't seem fazed by Shinji's breakdown. In fact, he completely ignored it. _"You will interact TABRIS, an AI created by NERV."_

TABRIS was apparently some kind of artificially intelligent android…or something…that was in the last stages of being developed. The only thing now was it needed to be socialized and recorded in its interactions with a human. Their interactions would be watched and recorded for data.

 _I don't understand why they need me._ Shinji thought. _Can't anyone do this?_ He glanced at Rei, who was staring blankly at the elevator's door. "We are here." She said, her voice was clipped but soft.

The elevator stopped and slid open. This hall was a lot different from the busy one above them. It was dimly lit, and there were only two doors on opposite sides of the hall. One was labeled TABRIS. Rei pressed her finger to the access pad.

Shinji stepped into a tiny box of a room with a chair right in the center. It was facing a glass wall, something that reminded Shinji of an aquarium. But, on the other side was a bedroom. There was a neatly made bed, a book shelf, a desk, and a dresser. There was a small hallway that led to somewhere Shinji couldn't see. The room looked like a display one would see in a furniture store. It didn't look lived in. Rei had closed the door behind him and he was alone.

The first thing Shinji heard was music.

 _Ode to Joy…_ Shinji realized. The piano music seeped through the glass, it was beautiful…there must be a music player in one of the rooms Shinji couldn't see. Shinji glanced at the camera in the corner of the room. Was he supposed to just start talking? _Um…_ He reached out and tapped the glass with a nervous hand. The music immediately cut off.

A figure appeared in the hall on the other side of the glass. Shinji's heart nearly stopped in his chest. _Is that…?_ The figure seemed to hesitate only for a moment before walking forward into the light of the bedroom.

It was…a boy. _He looks like Rei._ His eyes were red, skin pale, and hair a pale silver…almost as white as his skin. There was something unsettling about his perfectly symmetrical face and long elegant body. _He looks…_ fake. Despite the elegance of the boy in front of him, Shinji couldn't help but notice how artificial he was. _Maybe he doesn't look so much like Rei._ Where Rei's expression was blank, this boy's seemed to analyze everything. Eyes darted over Shinji's face and a smile immediately spread over his thin lips. He started walking forward in a strange _too-_ fluid gate.

"A-Are you TABRIS?" Shinji squeaked, his voice suddenly lost. _How could someone make something like this?_

"Yes." TABRIS replied, his voice was silky and smooth. He'd grabbed his desk chair and mechanically placed it across from Shinji. There was just a thin piece of glass between them now. Shinji couldn't stop staring at the…thing…sitting in front of him. Shinji wracked his brain for something to say, but he could only gaze in disbelief.

"Actually," TABRIS suddenly said, his head tilting slightly to the side, "I am part of the TABRIS series."

"TABRIS series?" Shinji pulled at his school shirt uncomfortably. It was strange. He was usually shy around other people, but the AI in front of him wasn't really a person…yet he was just as shy as usual. "S-So there are more of…you?"

"I do not know." A pause to think, and then, "I call myself Kaworu. I picked my name."

"You p-picked it?"

"Yes."

Shinji peeked at the camera in the corner of the room again, wondering how many people were watching and scribbling his habits on a thick notebook.

"I'm Shinji." He mumbled, shyly meeting TABRI—Kaworu's gaze. It was too intense, too focused, like it was sucking up every observation it could possibly make.

"Shinji." Kaworu repeated, a smile stretching his lips again. "I like that name, maybe I will pick that name instead."

"What?" Shinji's face brightened in embarrassment. He flapped his hands around. "No—no I think you should keep your name."

"Okay."

They lapsed into more awkward silence. Well, Shinji felt awkward, but Kaworu probably didn't have the capacity to feel that.

"You are nervous." Kaworu suddenly said.

"It's just hot in here." Shinji shot back, defending the little dignity he had.

"You are lying." Kaworu replied. "Humans wear their feelings on their faces to better communicate with one another." Shinji didn't really have a response to that. Instead, he looked to the camera in the corner of the room for the millionth time. Kaworu's gaze followed his before quickly returning to Shinji's face.

"You are the first visitor I have ever had." He said, grabbing the boy's attention again. Shinji pursed his lips, folding his hands in his lap to try and stop their nervous fidgeting.

"I am? That must be lonely." Shinji laughed nervously.

"Loneliness is strictly a human experience."

"So you're never lonely?" Shinji frowned.

"No." Kaworu tilted his head to the side, and Shinji was painfully aware of his eyes analyzing Shinji's face. "Are you lonely?"

"No. I'm around people all the time." Shinji scratched at his neck as another disquieting smile touched Kaworu's face.

 _What's with that smile?_ "What is it?" Shinji asked, his cheeks heating up.

"I think we should be friends." Kaworu said, his voice rang like wind chimes. Shinji bunched the fabric of his pants in his hands. He tried to offer Kaworu a smile back in return but he's sure it looked awkward and lopsided in comparison.

"M-Maybe."

The door slid open and Rei stepped through. Shinji stood up, getting the impression his time was done here. Kaworu looked at Rei with a strange expression before standing up. He gave Shinji one last curious look before disappearing completely from the room.

The music started back up again.

 _Is Rei also…_ Shinji glanced at the girl. They were back in the elevator. She looked like Kaworu, but they were completely different in movement and nature. There was something almost predatory about Kaworu. _Predatory and unsettling._ Rei was mechanical in comparison, but although her expression was stiff, Shinji thought she could be soft and delicate if given the chance.

But he didn't like this. He didn't even know what was going on, what NERV was…what his father was up to. He'd made up his mind by the time they reached the top floor.

 _I will not be coming back here after today._

 **Notes2: This is also going to be uploaded on tumblr ( .com) so if you want to see more of my stuff and info on the story, go follow it please! Also, what did you think? I don't know if I'm going to upload more but if people want it then I will. Thanks!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Note: So I realized that my tumblr isn't even at the bottom of the last chapter (oops), its woruds dot tumblr dot...you get it. No one really asked for this but here's the second chapter anyway**

2.

Shinji still didn't understand how he ended up here again. Actually, he didn't understand how any of the recent events of his life even made sense. Shinji fiddled with the ID clipped to his school shirt. NERV had somehow managed to get one made for him by the end of his first trip to the complex.

"This way." Rei motioned for Shinji to get into the elevator with her.

 _I still don't understand what I'm doing here._ He thought sadly as he stared at Rei from the corner of his eye. _And I still don't get what her deal is._ Was she like Kaworu?

Although Shinji had been to NERV a couple of times now, he hadn't seen Kaworu since the first time. He'd been brought back to do random physical tests, answer dull questions about his life, and do some kind of computer "brain games". _I haven't seen father again either…_ for that, Shinji was grateful.

Still, the last thing he wanted to do was return to NERV headquarters after his strange experience. Yet now Shinji found himself not only returning, but living with Misato. After a weird chain of circumstances and strings the secretive company pulled, Shinji found it easier to just stop fighting it. _Besides, all I have to do is talk to a robot._

Although, he had to admit living with Misato took some getting used to. Her small apartment looked like a hoarder's paradise and definitely wasn't ready for a guest to move in. Shinji never saw so many empty beer cans in his life; he could probably build an entire separate apartment with all of them. Luckily he didn't have much stuff so moving into his tiny room proved less difficult than originally planned. Misato wasn't too bad either. Sometimes she was hard to deal with since she had less issues with personal space than Shinji, but over all she was nice. She also took her job very seriously. Shinji would often wake up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom and find her up at the dining table with multiple files and documents spread out before her.

However, despite his new living arrangements and the times he visited NERV, Shinji was no closer knowing anything about the company than he had been since day one.

"Hey, Rei," Shinji suddenly blurted, causing the girl to rip her focused gaze from the back of the elevator door, "do you live here?" She seemed to consider his question before answering,

"Yes. I live here." Rei replied. The elevator came to a halt and the door slid open.

"A-Are you…" Shinji hesitated, "…are you like Kaworu?"

"TABRIS." Her eyes suddenly flashed, sharp and focused.

"Uh-yes, TABRIS." Shinji mumbled as he began to exit the elevator. It didn't seem like Rei was going to lead him this time since she made no indication of movement.

"No." She said. "We are not the same."

Shinji turned just as the elevator's door was closing. Their eyes connected, and they stood in silence until the door finally slipped shut. He was alone.

The stark contrast between this section of NERV and the one above was still enough to make Shinji uneasy. The lights down here were dull, and not a single employee wandered the halls. Only a door labeled TABRIS gave any indication of what could be hidden down here. Shinji held his ID card in his sweaty palm.

The room across Kaworu's was still a mystery. _There's not even an access pad to it…_ Shinji noticed. _It must be a closet or something,_ he dismissed, pressing his card to the pad. To his surprise, it blinked green and opened. _I guess I'm in the system._

Everything looked like it had the first time Shinji was here…except a giant crack in the glass. It reminded Shinji of a spider web, the way it was tightly crunched together in the center and then spread through the surrounding glass like bolts of frozen lightning. With a trembling hand Shinji reached out and touched it. The glass on his side was still smooth, which meant it was broken from the other side.

Piano music had been filling the room with an eerily cheery tone. It was just like last time, except Shinji didn't recognize the song. He sat stiffly in the chair, his eyes continuously shifting to the shattered glass. _Do I just call out to him?_

"Kaworu?" Shinji's voice came out a lot higher than he'd like to admit.

The music stopped.

Kaworu appeared in the hall, looking almost like a ghost. His eyes flashed to Shinji's face with the same hungry focus they did before. Shinji had almost forgotten how bizarre the other moved as Kaworu walked forward with that disquieting smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"Shinji." He said pleasantly, placing his desk chair where it had been before. "I was wondering if we would ever talk again."

Shinji kept his hands folded neatly in his lap in order to keep them from fidgeting. To his surprise, he saw Kaworu mimic the same position. "Um yeah," Shinji mumbled, feeling uncomfortable under Kaworu's gaze, "I think I'll be coming back a lot…" He already knew he was too much of a coward to ignore NERV's persistence.

Kaworu's smile somehow stretched wider. "I am glad. I have spent a lot of time thinking about you."

Shinji released a strangled sound somewhere between embarrassment and surprise. He knew his face must be glowing red in the dim lighting. Kaworu seemed amused by this.

"You-You don't just tell people you just met that kind of stuff." Shinji chuckled, nervously trying to laugh his embarrassment away.

Tilting his head to the side, Kaworu inquired, "No?"

"No…you keep that to yourself." Kaworu looked like he was learning about the discovery of life on another planet rather than just a simple piece of social etiquette.

"Okay." Kaworu said after a moment. They lapsed into silence then, and the robot seemed too content to just stare quietly at Shinji for Shinji not to feel awkward.

 _What do I say…he's just staring at me?_ Shinji tapped an uneasy beat against his leg, _Ah! That's right…_

"Do you have a music player in the other room?" He questioned.

"No." Kawory answered, but his expression seemed to brighten. "I have a piano. I quite enjoy playing it."

"What?" Shinji didn't bother to keep the amazement from seeping into his voice. "That was you? You can play the piano?"

"Yes. I think music is one of the highest achievements of mankind." Kaworu leaned forward to the point where his breath would have fogged up the glass. _Except he doesn't have any,_ Shinji realized with a start. "Do you agree?"

Shinji leaned away from the clear barrier separating them. "Uh-Um," he blinked, "yeah…yes I think so."

"Do you play any instruments, Shinji?" Kaworu asked, still disturbingly close to the glass.

"I played cello a long time ago…but I wasn't nearly as good as—"

"Cello." Kaworu hummed, finally leaning back and adopting a more relaxed position. Shinji relaxed slightly too. "I would like to learn cello someday." For the first time since Shinji got here Kaworu's focus left him instead to look at the camera. His attention only stayed there momentarily before he turned back to Shinji. "Maybe you can teach me cello and I will teach you piano." He suggested.

Eyes widening, Shinji felt his face heat up again. It was such a normal request. _But I could never…_ "I-I don't know if I'm good enough to teach cello, it's been really long since I've played it…"

"It is okay, I am a fast learner, I am sure you would be an excellent teacher, Shinji." Kaworu offered him another smile, but this one seemed less predatory and artificial. The kind words threw Shinji off guard, he wasn't used to getting compliments. Usually he'd just dismiss them and say something self deprecating back.

But this time he smiled.

* * *

Shinji lay in bed staring at the ceiling. Every time he closed his eyes he saw Kaworu smiling at him brightly, so focused on him. No one had ever seemed that focused on him…not ever. But then again, it was hard not to be nice to the only person you had contact with. The hardest thing to wrap his head around was the fact that Kaworu was just a machine. _How could a machine smile like that and be so nice?_ It was all so confusing.

A clang from outside his room caused Shinji to sit up. The light from the living room glowed faintly from the hall. Shinji got up to check if everything was okay, Misato always worked herself into exhaustion during this time of the night.

Sure enough, she was on the couch, head back and mouth open as she snored loudly. Her hand hung limply from the cushioned arm and an empty wine glass was laying on the floor directly under it. Shinji sighed, making his way to the small living room and picking up the offending glass. There were papers all over the couch and Misato's lap. One in particular caught his attention.

 _TABRIS_ was written in Misato's large sloppy handwriting in the margins of a document filled with tiny text. A red line was drawn connecting _TABRIS_ to another sloppily written word: _SEELE._ After it was three question marks.

 _What is SEELE?_ Shinji wondered, scrunching his brow. He leaned down to get a better look at the document but Misato suddenly flinched awake.

"Shinji!" She gasped, and only then did Shinji notice he was practically in her lap trying to read what the form said. He was flooded with embarrassment immediately.

"No! I was just picking this up!" He cried, waving the wine glass erratically in the air. Misato raised an eyebrow as if she didn't believe him. Nearly jumping away, Shinji put some space between him and the woman.

"If you were any other boy I might have been worried." She sighed, trying to dispel the awkwardness. "But I could kick your ass if you try anything funny, you hear me?"

"Yes ma'am!" Shinji completely believed her.

But still, he wondered what kind of things Misato was researching, and what Kaworu and SEELE really were.


	3. Chapter 3

Notes: Finally, UH I'm not a huge fan of how this chapter came out, I kind of hate it hahaha but I've been busy with projects for school so don't worry things should get better from here...and if you're reading this thank you so much! It means a lot!

ARTIFICIAL 3

"Have you ever left your room?" Shinji blurted one visit. Kaworu was sitting attentively in his desk chair like he always was.

"No." Kaworu answered after a pause. "But, a long time ago, when I was created…I remember being in a different room very similar to this one."

"Where?" Shinji asked, leaning in from his chair, like he was exchanging secrets in a school classroom.

Kaworu simply smiled, his eyes never leaving Shinji. "I am afraid I do not remember." He said.

"Oh." Shinji relaxed a little and tapped his finger against his pant leg. "Do you think you'll ever get to leave?" He hoped so, Kaworu always seemed so curious about what the world was like outside of this strange company's walls. He'd often ask Shinji about school, or what his new awkward living situation was like. Shinji was a little perplexed at how interested Kaworu seemed in his life. The only thing that was remotely exhilarating was coming to NERV, but aside from that Shinji couldn't provide Kaworu with much excitement.

Despite this, the two developed a strange friendship. Shinji found himself looking forward to seeing Kaworu. No one had ever been so invested in him before, and Shinji would be lying to himself if he said it didn't feel nice. Sometimes he'd think about what it would be like if Kaworu didn't have to be stuck in NERV headquarters. They could walk to school together and sit next to each other in class. But then Shinji would suddenly remember Kaworu wasn't human. _It's so easy to forget._

"Maybe someday." Kaworu murmured, the same lazy smile touching his lips.

"What would you do? If you could leave."

"I would like to follow you around." The AI answered, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Shinji bristled in embarrassment.

"You can't just follow people around!" He found himself laughing. "People would think you're a stalker."

"I would ask you first then."

"Still," Shinji shook his head, "you can't just ask someone if you can follow them around."

Kaworu tilted his head in the way that he did whenever learning a new piece of human information.

"So I would ask to spend time with you." He said after a while. Shinji smiled and nodded his head in approval. The two sat together in amiable silence when the lights suddenly cut out. Immediately the tiny room was swarmed with darkness, and Shinji couldn't even see his hand in front of his own face. _What is this? Is the power out?_

"H-Hello?" Shinji stood up from his chair, feeling off-balance with no sense of direction. The darkness made Shinji panic and he tripped over the chair trying to find his way to the door.

"Are you alright?" He heard Kaworu calmly asked. _He must have heard me fall._

"Y-Yes, I think the power's out." Shinji tried to compose his nerves as he stood back up. The lights came back on as fast as they had gone out.

 _"Power malfunction currently under investigation, back up generators activated."_ A steady female voice announced over NERV'S PA system. Shinji turned around to see Kaworu still sitting in his chair.

"When the power goes off like that," Kaworu said, "they can not hear us." His red eyes flickered to the camera, and Shinji followed it to see that the light that usually meant the device was recording wasn't on. He looked back to Kaworu startled.

Kaworu placed a pale hand flat against the glass and smiled, it was different than most of his smiles. _It looks sad._

A small beep sounded and the camera's light turned back on.

Shinji couldn't help but remember the large crack that still resided in the clear wall's surface.

* * *

"Misato," Shinji mumbled with his head leaning lazily against the passenger's window, "what does NERV need with something like Kaworu?"

"I already told you, it's classified." Misato replied, taking a sharp turn back onto the main road. It was a response Shinji was used to hearing. "I know you've befriended…him," Misato said after a pause, "but TABRIS isn't a person, Shinji, we can't just let a highly intelligent android wander around Tokyo."

"I know." Shinji sighed. "So you've been listening?"

"That's why you were brought to NERV."

 _And I still don't get it! It has to do with my father._ Shinji thought bitterly. He was still no closer to understanding the strange company and its CEO, but he did learn something that he'd been keeping to himself. _Misato doesn't know much about Kaworu either…_ he was sure of it, otherwise she wouldn't stay up so late digging into documents labeled TABRIS. But why would NERV keep a secret about its own product from its employees?

The image of Kaworu sadly smiling at the pane of glass between them was an image Shinji wished he could forget. _Kaworu said he couldn't feel lonely._ Shinji reminded himself, trying to lighten his mood.

 _But maybe that's because he's never had the chance to._

* * *

"Hey, Rei, where are we going?" Shinji rushed to keep up with the girl as they passed the usual elevator they took down to Kaworu.

"A different way." She said, not even glancing back to make sure Shinji could keep up. _She walks so fast…_

"But why—"

"Your father."

Shinji stopped. He furrowed his brows and frowned. Rei slowed as well, sensing Shinji was no longer following her as she turned to face him. Employees were milling about the halls interested in whatever business they had going on.

"My father?" The venom was impossible to hide from Shinji's voice. "What does he want?"

"He wants you to make contact." Rei replied patiently, waiting for Shinji to come join her. _Contact?_ "Contact with TABRIS." She clarified, as if she could read his mind.

"I don't understand, isn't that what I've been doing?"

"There will be no walls this time."

 _No walls…_ Shinji felt his stomach drop. Shinji had enjoyed his time with Kaworu, the other was nice and always liked to know about his life but…there was still that predatory underlying quality to Kaworu that Shinji remembered the first time they had encountered each other. He'd been day dreaming about what it'd be like to hang out with Kaworu without a clear boarder separating them, but now that the opportunity presented itself, Shinji found himself nervous.

"Is that safe?" Shinji squeaked, hating how his palms sweat.

"Safe?"

"Y-yes! How can you know what Kaworu will do? I-I saw the glass! Father thinks he can just push me around and shove me where ever he—" Rei walked forward and her hand flashed so fast Shinji never saw it grab onto his own. Her skin was warm and her grip was gentle, like a warm memory.

"It is safe." She said, and for a moment her eyes were just as intense as Kaworu's. Shinji was silent, his mind a garbled mess as Rei tugged him to walk forward and continue down the hall. She dropped his hand once she knew he was following her.

They eventually got to an elevator on the opposite side of the complex that Rei needed to activate by pressing her finger against the access pad. The ride down was just as long and awkward as it usually was, but this time Shinji's stomach felt like it was doing back flips inside of him.

"Are there cameras?" He found himself wondering as the elevator doors opened.

"Yes." Rei stepped out as Shinji reached for his ID. She noticed the movement and shook her head. "Your card will not work here."

Instead of another hall the elevator had opened to a tiny room with a door right across from it. The door was heavy and metal, TABRIS ENTRY was engraved in the center. Shinji swallowed the lump in his throat.

"I don't think I can do this." He whimpered, despite walking up to the door. It clinked and a thousand locks sounded as though they were being undone at once before it slid open.

"You will be safe." Rei assured as Shinji stepped through the threshold. The door shut immediately behind him.

Shinji was in a box with tiled floors and metal walls. The lights above him were florescent and harsh. He couldn't even look up at the ceiling without squinting. Off to his right was a thin hall that looked like it led into another room. Shinji took a hesitant step toward it. "Kaworu? It's me, Shinji." Shinji felt his heart beating in his throat.

As silent as a ghost, Kaworu appeared at the end of the small hall.

Kaworu's strange fluid movements were even more perplexing without a barrier. He nearly danced his way to Shinji, and Shinji found himself taking a startled step back.

"Shinji?" For the first time Kaworu sounded surprised. Shinji froze up at the proximity between them, Kaworu nearly pressed himself against Shinji's front as he stared at the boy in disbelief. _He's a few inches taller than me,_ Shinji noticed.

"Kaworu," Shinji wedged his hands between his and the other's chest, taking another step back, "you're too close." His back bumped against the heavy metal door. Kaworu's eyes drank up every detail of Shinji before he tilted his head slightly. A smile touched his mouth in sudden understanding.

"Oh. I am sorry, I have forgotten my manners, I am just surprised to see you this way." The smile he offered Shinji was so warm and kind that Shinji felt guilty of being so afraid earlier. _How could I ever be scared of Kaworu?_

"My-My father wanted me to…" at a loss for words Shinji simply gestured at the room around him and hoped he could keep it at that. The android seemed to ponder this for a second before nodding.

The metal was cool against Shinji's back, and he was painfully aware of how awkard this whole thing was. Like usual, Kaworu didn't seem to notice, he was too busy looking at Shinji in that hyper focused way he always did. _If I don't do something, he'll just stand there and stare at me all day._

"Um," Shinji scratched the back of his head, "this is where you live?"

"Yes." Kaworu said. "Ah, would you like me to show you around? That is something humans do for their guests." Kaworu waited for Shinji to nod before gracefully turning around to walk down the short hall he came from. After a moments hesitation Shinji followed.

The next room they entered was a lot like the first one. It was small with tile floor and bare walls, but it was cluttered with metal tables filled with wires, notepads, and strange pieces of tech Shinji had never seen before. Kaworu didn't seem particularly interested in this room as he didn't even stop as he explained, "This is my testing room, it holds nothing interesting." _Testing room?_ But Kaworu had already turned another right corner. "This room is my favorite." His voice floated from the adjacent chamber, and Shinji gasped.

The walls and floor were once again nothing special, but in the middle of the room was a gleaming black grand piano. It held nothing else but for a bench and some sheet music. Kaworu was standing before the shining white keys, an equally white finger pressing absently at one of them. The note echoed through the empty corridors. Shinji didn't even want to touch it; afraid his fingers would smudge the perfection.

"Magnificent, isn't it? Truly mankind's greatest invention."

"It's amazing." Shinji stood next to Kaworu, catching his reflection in the gleaming surface.

"Would you like to play it?" Kaworu inquired, pressing another key. Shinji bit his lip.

"Ah-no, I don't know how."

"You have played the cello."

"That's not the same thing."

"I see." Kaworu took a seat on the bench. "I can teach you." Shinji sat beside the other, the tour suddenly forgotten.

"I don't even want to touch it." Shinji admitted. "It's so perfect."

"A well loved piano should have a lot of finger prints on it, do you not think so?" Kaworu smiled, playing a quick melody. His eyes never left Shinji but his fingers moved across the piano with such confidence and beauty Shinji couldn't help but smile too. He reached out awkwardly and pressed down on a random note, it rang loud and high.

"I-I do remember from school," Shinji murmured, placing three fingers on the piano, "we learned this song…'hot cross buns'." He then proceeded to press the three keys in an order that they made a choppy but recognizable melody. Kaworu seemed endlessly amused by this. So much so that he reproduced the short song in a lower key.

"And so you have taught me something new." He chuckled.

"I guess so." Shinji laughed back, staring at his hands. He then proceeded to poke at different keys, not really making any music, just putting random things together. Kaworu seemed just fine watching Shinji do this and time passed slow but enjoyably.

"Shinji." Kaworu said after a long while.

"Hm?" Shinji looked up from his hands to see Kaworu staring at him with an odd expression.

"What does it feel like?"

"What?" Shinji raised an eyebrow.

"The piano. What do the keys feel like?"

 _The keys?_ "Um," Shinji glanced down and rubbed at the surface of one of them with his finger, "I don't know…smooth I guess…" He continued the action and Kaworu watched with his usual attentiveness. "Can you not feel them?" Shinji asked, the thought had never occurred to him. To be able to touch something but not _really_ touch it. _Like constantly wearing a pair of gloves._

"They feel the same as wood, glass, and metal." Kaworu said, poking a note. "If I closed my eyes I would not be able to distinguish which is which." He played "hot cross buns" but the short tune somehow felt hollow. "Can I touch your hand?" Kaworu asked after playing the short melody.

Shinji felt the blood rise to his cheeks in embarrassment. Shinji simply held out his hand palm up and Kaworu took it gingerly, as if it were made of glass. Kaworu's skin was smooth, smooth to the point where it felt rubbery. He ran his thumbs over the ridges of Shinji's palm and leaned down to inspect the pattern on the end of each finger.

"Incredible." Kaworu murmured, like he was examining a precious stone.

 _Kaworu's hands aren't warm or cold,_ Shinji noticed. He could feel the harsh skeleton directly under the thin layer of pale skin. And in that moment, with his sweaty hand in the other's unfeeling mechanical grip, Kaworu had never seemed more human.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks again to the few of you who leave reviews, they're so nice to see :)**

 **quick reminder that my tumblr is woruds if you would like to follow the story on there instead! Hope you enjoy**

Artificial 4

"Um, Kaworu?" Shinji's hand twitched from where it was still being cradled in Kaworu's grip. Kaworu would have gladly sat on the piano bench to squeeze and observe Shinji's hand all day if the boy didn't finally tug it away.

"S-Sorry," Shinji apologized meekly when Kaworu looked up, "I—" He didn't really have an appropriate reason for pulling his hand back. _Unless I told him I was getting uncomfortable,_ and Shinji didn't want to bother Kaworu with that. Although, based off the look Kaworu gave him, he guessed the other already knew. So he left the silence undisturbed.

Until the lights went out.

 _What? Again?_ Shinji flinched, disoriented by the sudden darkness.

"It appears as though the power has shut down again." Kaworu's voice floated through the blackness like a calm song.

Shinji shifted uncomfortably on the piano bench, unsure if he should stay sitting or stand. "Does-does this happen a lot?" Shinji ultimately stayed where he was. If this was anything like last time, the power should come back in a few minutes.

"No." Kaworu replied, and a subtle red glow just barely illuminated the portion of the piano the two were sitting at. Shinji jerked in surprise when he realized the light was coming from Kaworu's eyes. The other offered him a smile, but it ended up looking eerie rather than comforting. Kaworu's bight eyes caused stark shadows to form against the plains of his angular face and his pale exterior was awash in red light.

 _Your eyes glow,_ Shinji wanted to say, but instead he asked, "I-it doesn't?"

"No." Kaworu answered again, turning his attention back to the piano and playing a quick melody. "I imagine one would have to meddle with the power grid in order to make it malfunction more than once so close together." His fingers glided over the keys like slim ghosts.

 _What is he saying?_ "Why would someone do that?" Shinji murmured, and Kaworu's glowing eyes snapped up and locked on his with such intensity the boy flinched and had to look away.

"Shinji," Kaworu's voice was soft and gentle, "do you consider us to be friends?"

The brunette's gaze shifted back to Kaworu warily. "Yes." He said, not even having to pause and consider the question. Despite the strange circumstance of their relationship, Kaworu was the closest thing Shinji had to a friend.

"Then it is customary for humans to consider their friends' advice, is it not?"

"Yes?" Shinji raised his eyebrows, unsure of where Kaworu was going.

"You should not be involved with NERV." Kaworu said quietly. His hands were frozen over the piano keys, so still they could have been made of stone. "If I were more selfish perhaps I would not try and discourage you from coming here." Kaworu paused as if unsure how to articulate his next sentence. "However, I have found myself caring deeply for you and believe it would be in your best interest if you do not engage yourself with the events that happen here."

Shinji's racing thoughts stopped as though they suddenly slammed into a blank wall. He could feel blood rising to his cheeks and his pulse jolt. _Kaworu…_ Shinji was unable to properly digest the information the other had given him. Instead, _caring deeply for you,_ played over and over in his head like a broken record. No one had ever said that to him.

No one had admitted to caring for him.

Shinji finally opened his mouth to respond—but the lights suddenly flickered back on and the same announcement that alerted NERV from last time played. Blinking, Kaworu's eyes were no longer glowing and he turned his attention back to the instrument in front of them. He began to play _Ode to Joy._

The sound of the large metal door bursting open caused Shinji to nearly fall out of his seat. Kaworu continued playing as if he didn't hear it, and for a minute Shinji thought he was going insane until Misato and two other employees ran into the piano room. Kaworu stopped playing abruptly. Misato's hair clung to her face in disarray, and she was hunched over holding both her knees out of breath.

"Shinji," Misato rasped, "you're alright."

"Of course I'm alright." Shinji furrowed his brow, standing up clumsily.

"We were unable to hear or see anything on the feed due to the power outage." Misato straightened, fixing her hair and any wrinkles in her tight shirt.

 _Was she concerned, do they really think Kaworu would hurt me?_ And if so, why would they stick him in the same room as the other?

"The power has been rather finicky lately, hasn't it?" Kaworu mused, his eyes sucking in every detail of the new employees he had just been exposed to. The gaze clearly made the three uncomfortable, and Misato regarded Kaworu with nothing more but a cool glare.

"Shinji," she said, "your time is up for today."

* * *

The table was silent as Misato and Shinji ate their dinner. Shinji had offered to cook today because he was sick of instant noodles. It was nothing fancy—Shinji couldn't call himself a chef—just fish and rice, but Misato gobbled it gratefully. She'd even gone so far as to move the countless papers from the table in order to set it for the occasion.

The lack of noise, though, wasn't as amiable as the silence shared between Shinji and Kaworu. It demanded to be destroyed. Shinji had too many questions buzzing in his brain after what Kaworu had told him. But over all of them, Kaworu's confession rang the loudest.

 _"I have found myself caring deeply for you..."_

He shook his head, jamming sticky white rice into his mouth. _I shouldn't be focusing on that!_ He reprimanded. _It's NERV, Kaworu thinks I shouldn't go back there._ Shinji glanced across the table at Misato; she was chewing on a piece of grilled fish and deeply invested in her smart phone. _She's been researching Kaworu, NERV must be keeping something from her._

Shinji had seen the documents, and most of them were about the said android. Misato seemed deeply interested in where Kaworu had come from. After snooping, Shinji found out NERV didn't make Kaworu at all, but some other company called SEELE.

"Misato, what's SEELE?" Shinji asked, the question pouring from his mouth before he had a chance to stop it. Misato froze mid-chew, the sound of her gulping down her food was the only noise in the small apartment.

"Where did you hear about SEELE?" Misato narrowed her eyes. "Did TABRIS say something?"

"No." Shinji blurted defensively. "K-Kaworu didn't say anything. You leave those papers all over the place, and I—"

"You've been looking through my stuff?" Misato raised an angry eyebrow, folding her arms tightly across her chest.

"No! Well, I-I just happened to see them laying around and…" Shinji fidgeted in his seat, regretting his confession immediately based off of Misato's expression, "…Kaworu's not from NERV, is he?" He finished. Misato seemed to consider his question for a long moment before she visibly relaxed.

"No." She sighed, picking up her chopsticks. "I guess it's only fair to tell you." Pointing her chopsticks at Shinji, she pursed her lips. "But this is classified, I can't let you go around telling this to all your friends."

 _What friends?_ "I won't." Shinji promised.

"The truth is I don't know much more about TAB—Kaworu or SEELE than you." She murmured. "I'm pretty sure only a few people at NERV know the whole story."

"Why are you looking into it?"

"Because the whole thing seems fishy." Misato ate a mouthful of rice. "SEELE was a company much like NERV, both were working with robotics in order to better society. But apparently SEELE became obsessed with the idea of artificial intelligence, and wanted to use their technology to create something better than humankind itself." Misato caught Shinji's expression and sighed. "I know; it all seems like something out of a bad science fiction novel. But eventually SEELE went bankrupt and your father bought out the company. From what I could find, around those dates is when Kaworu arrived at NERV." Misato leaned back in her chair. "So you can see my concern. We know Kaworu is an artificially intelligent android, but we don't know what he was made to do. Maybe he was just a successful experiment, but I don't think SEELE would hand him over so easily unless they had some kind of plan we don't know about…not even your father."

Misato looked at Shinji sharply. "Shinji, I need you to try and get Kaworu to tell you about everything he knows about SEELE."

Shinji flinched. "What?" He was still trying to take in the information Misato had just told him. "Why me? Why can't you ask him?"

"We've tried, employees have even shut him down and gone through his code but found nothing."

 _Shut him down?_ The idea that Kaworu could be shut down horrified Shinji, but what did he expect? It was hard to remember that Kaworu wasn't really…. alive.

"I won't."

"Shinji—"

"And what are you going to do if Kaworu was made for something you don't like?" His anger flared and he stood up. All anyone ever wanted to do was use him, even his own father. The only one who hadn't was Kaworu. "Are you just going shut him down?"

"No I—"

"Find someone else to interrogate Kaworu, I don't want to." Shinji left the room.

He'd be lying if he said he didn't want to know more about Kaworu, that's why he asked Misato in the first place. But what if he found something out that put the other in danger? What if Shinji was about to lose the only friend he ever had?


	5. Chapter 5

Artificial 5

"Shinji, about yesterday," Misato's eyes remained focused on the dirt road ahead of them, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have put all that on you."

Shinji opted to keep his attention on the trees rushing by outside his window. The car ride to NERV was awkward after yesterday's dinner conversation. Shinji just wanted it to go as quickly as possible. He remembered Kaworu's warning, and how the other had said it would be best if he didn't get involved with NERV anymore. Shinji didn't doubt that this was good advice. His life used to be so simple and predictable, and ever since getting involved with his father's strange company things have been confusing and stressful.

But he couldn't leave now.

He didn't care about his father or what Misato might think of him. He didn't want to leave because leaving would mean he'd never see Kaworu again.

The rest of the drive was spent in tense silence until they were lowered into NERV headquarters. Rei was there to greet them as Misato and Shinji took their separate ways.

"This way." Rei murmured, leading Shinji down the same path they took yesterday.

"I'm going back in Kaworu's room?" Shinji asked with a weird sort of excitement.

"Yes." Rei waited for Shinji to join her in the elevator.

"I wonder if the power will go out again." Shinji mumbled as the doors slid shut. Rei visibly stiffened, and the observation wasn't lost to Shinji.

"The system has not been cooperating as it usually does." She said, eyes forward.

"Do you know why?" Shinji curiously inquired.

"No." Rei replied flatly as the elevator stopped. The large metal door waited for Shinji and Rei as they stepped out. He couldn't help but find it intimidating. _So much effort to keep Kaworu inside…_ Shinji thought of the things Misato had shared with him.

Shinji just barely heard piano music seeping out from the stone walls. Rei let Shinji inside and shut the door with a loud slam. Flinching at the noise, he noticed the piano music had stopped. He hesitated before walking through the room filled with tables and gadgets to the one with the piano. Kaworu was sitting half turned on the bench in the direction Shinji had just come. His body was twisted in such a casual pose but he looked so elegant with his impossibly pale flawless skin and white halo of hair. Shinji scrunched up his nose when he felt his cheeks warming up, and rubbed at his face with a confused hand.

"Hi." Shinji awkwardly mumbled.

"Hello." Kaworu's expression immediately split into a smile and Shinji forgot all that stuff he'd learned yesterday. "You have returned."

"Yes." It was impossible to know what was going through Kaworu's head. _Is he mad I didn't listen to him?_ They sat in uncomfortable silence until Kaworu stood up from the piano in a swift movement.

"Shall we finish our tour from yesterday? I never showed you the last room."

Shinji nodded, grateful for something distracting.

"This is the room that you are the most familiar with." Kaworu said as he led Shinji down another short hall and into the sterile bedroom. Shinji immediately recognized it as he stepped over neutral carpet and observed unused bland furniture. A wall of glass separated him from the chair that he'd had countless conversations with Kaworu in the first few times he'd come to NERV. Shinji walked over to the clear barrier and pressed his hand against it. The glass fogged up around his warm skin.

"It's weird being on the other side." Shinji murmured, his eyes glued to the crack just on the side of him. He resisted the urge to reach over and touch it. Turning, he noticed Kaworu staring at him with his recognizable hungry gaze. "Do you spend a lot of time in here?" He asked, walking to the bed and pressing down on the mattress with a nervous hand. _The mattress is so stiff._

"When I am not playing the piano." Kaworu's eyes followed Shinji as he took an awkward seat on the corner of the mattress. After a second Kaworu joined him. The firm mattress barely bent at his added weight. "This is the room I met you in, so I have grown fond of it."

Shinji sputtered, his hands immediately shooting up to cover the blush that must be painting his cheeks red.

"You grow so flustered whenever I compliment you." Hands wrapped themselves around Shinji's wrists and tugged the boy's own away from his face. Shinji's eyes widened at the proximity between himself and Kaworu. Kaworu was so close Shinji could see the details of his deep red eyes. They reminded him of camera lenses. "It amuses me. Do not hide your face, I like to look at it."

"Kaworu!" Shinji forcefully pulled his hands free and shoved the other away. Kaworu simply shifted a little further down the mattress, the push not strong enough to actually move him. "You-You can't just get so close to people like that." He folded his arms tightly across his chest. "People like personal space. It's weird when you do those things."

"Oh." Kaworu seemed to process this information. "Forgive me, I have not socialized with humans properly."

"I know." Shinji replied awkwardly.

"Touching is a sort of intimacy I thought all humans enjoyed."

"It-it depends on the person." Shinji found his gaze unable to move from his thighs. "And friends don't usually get…intimate." Not that he'd know, Shinji didn't have much personal experience.

"I see." Kaworu's voice was quiet, and Shinji could feel the other's eyes burrowing into the side of his face. Desperate for a change in subject, he looked at the plain comforter the two of them were currently sitting on. He flopped down and stared at the ceiling; it was white. _Boring._

"Hey," Shinji suddenly blurted, "do you ever sleep?" He felt the mattress shift as Kaworu copied him, but kept his eyes focused on the wall above. Kaworu was so close, but he could feel no body heat radiating from the other's skin.

"No. I do not have to sleep."

"You don't have to sleep?" Shinji pursed his lips. "Not even to…recharge or something?" His face brightened, _what a weird question._ Kaworu's musical chuckle sounded beside him.

"My battery does not require charging." Shinji felt Kaworu shift and knew the other was now facing him completely.

"What kind of battery can run all the time?" Shinji found himself turning on his side as well, curiosity overtaking embarrassment.

"I have a nuclear battery." Kaworu smiled. "It has a long lifespan and requires little attention."

"That's so strange." Shinji found himself whispering. He couldn't believe that this seemingly living being before him was kept running off nothing but a fancy battery. "Just a battery keeps you going…"

"Humans and I have that in common I think." Kaworu answered. He reached out a pale hand but then hesitated, as if remembering what Shinji had told him earlier, and then brought it back to his side. "Your battery is just made of living tissue."

Shinji crinkled his nose in confusion before he realized what Kaworu was talking about. _The heart._ The android read his expression and continued, "But yours is arguably more fragile than mine…like glass." His heart pumped faster against his ribs, as if it knew it was being described. "So easily shattered, and not so easily repaired. Have you ever had your heart broken, Shinji?"

"Yes." _Why did I say that?_ Shinji snapped his mouth closed, bringing his hands to his chest and curling in on himself a little.

"By who?"

Shinji glanced around, knowing that somewhere there was a camera picking up their interactions and this entire conversation. But for some reason he didn't care.

"My father."

They laid in silence until it was time for Shinji to leave.

* * *

Rei walked Shinji to Misato's car.

 _It looks like Misato's not done yet…_ he noticed the car was still empty, but knew she usually got done a few minutes after him.

"Shinji."

He turned at Rei's voice and yelped in surprise as her hand shot out and grabbed his. She pressed something hard and rectangular into his palm.

"This will answer things."

Before he had a chance to say anything, she turned and walked away. Glancing down, Shinji saw it was another ID card, basically identical to the one he already had. Except in the bottom corner there was a small green bar.

He stuffed it into his pocket before Misato would see.


	6. Chapter 6

Artificial 6

Gendo Ikari touched a gloved hand against the cool smooth metal of the large machine in front of him. It was rooted in the ground like an ugly mechanical tree. The room was pitch black save for a single spot light shining down on the contraption from above. His glasses reflected the harsh light, making it impossible to read his expression.

ADAM was printed in large bold letters across the machine.

"Something like this," he said, "could destroy all of humanity within a few days." His white glove picked up dust as he slid his hand down the metal. "And its trigger is being held just above us."

Gendo turned, gesturing for Rei to follow.

She stared at the massive bomb for a few seconds longer before obeying.

* * *

 _Why would Rei give this to me?_ Shinji sat on his bed, staring at the ID card in his grip. His eyes were glued to the small green bar that resided in the corner. _It must be an all-access pass or something…_ He thought, flopping down against his mattress. The ceiling was painted orange because of the setting sun outside. _Still…what would Rei want me to see?_

Kaworu's warning rang in his mind and Shinji sighed in frustration. He was definitely involved in something deeper than he originally thought.

 _Kaworu…_ Shinji bit his lip, turning onto his side and closing his eyes. He wished Kaworu wasn't a robot, and that he was just a normal kid Shinji could hang out with. Kaworu was the only one who never asked Shinji to do things that he didn't like. He was the only one interested in Shinji's life, the only one who would compliment him, who said he'd cared about him…

Part of him wondered if Kaworu actually felt that way. After all, how can a computer have feelings? And yet, Shinji's mind refused to let him see it any other way. He was starved for attention and love. Despite the strange situation from where he received it, he wasn't willing to let it go.

* * *

The ID felt like it was burning a hole through his pant pocket as Shinji walked down NERV's familiar corridors. Misato hadn't confronted him yet about Kaworu, and for that he was grateful. Shinji didn't know if he could take that on top of everything he'd been thinking about.

With every room he passed, he wondered if his new card was able to access it. _What's the point in even having this?_ He thought bitterly. _I'd never be able to sneak off, not with all these cameras watching me…_ But was he really willing to sneak around?

"Hey," Shinji stopped walking, noticing Rei wasn't leading him anymore, "aren't we going to Kaworu's room?"

"No. Today you will be separately observed like you were in the beginning." She said, turning for the elevator Shinji hadn't used the last few times he'd come.

"Oh." He tried not to sound too disappointed, but it was hard to keep the emotion from his voice. Stepping into the elevator, Shinji was visibly deflated as the doors slid shut. It was nice not having to talk to Kaworu behind a pane of glass, it made their interactions seem a little more normal.

The doors opened and Shinji walked towards the entry labeled TABRIS. He glanced at the unlabeled door across from the other, and was even more aware of the ID in his pocket. _But that room doesn't even have an access pad…_ He thought, immediately dispelling any temporary rebelliousness. He pressed his regular card to the familiar door and entered. Everything looked just as it always did.

Sitting down, Shinji stared at the empty room in front of him. It reminded him of his own in a weird way. Shinji's room was messier and obviously lived in, but there was nothing in it that really made it special. He had no pictures or books that weren't for school. _Its not really my room anyway._ He was just staying in Misato's apartment until…until when? Once NERV got whatever information they needed from him interacting with Kaworu?

"Shinji."

Shinji flinched and looked up from his hands to see Kaworu hovering behind the glass.

"O-Oh Kaworu, you scared me." Shinji chuckled off his embarrassment.

"You are back in the observation room." The other responded, and due to his lack of facial expressions and voice nuances it was hard for Shinji to know how he felt about that.

"Yeah." Shinji sighed. "I was told to come here today."

"That is a shame." Kaworu walked to his desk and picked up his chair, proceeding to place it in front of Shinji like he had so many times before. "I enjoy having you in the same room as me. Hopefully you will be allowed back in here in the future."

"Hopefully." Shinji agreed as his cheeks heated up. "Or-or maybe you can come out here."

Kaworu smiled, his gaze seeming to swallow Shinji whole with his intensity.

"I would like that very much." He said.

"Yeah, me too…" Shinji murmured, more to himself than to Kaworu. "Do you think NERV will let you out soon? That's what all this is for, isn't it?"

"Perhaps." Kaworu's smile remained the same, maybe if he were human it would have faltered.

Shinji waited for more of a response. Frustration chewed at the edges of his thoughts the longer the silence lasted. "Well, they can't just keep you here forever." His hands tightened into fists.

"Shinji—"

"It's not fair."

The light's flickered before shutting down completely, leaving the two in blackness. Shinji stood up, looking around wildly even though he couldn't see his own hand in front of his face. _Again? How can this be happening again?_

"Kaworu?" Shinji pushed a hand forward and his palm came into contact with a smooth cold surface. "The power's out again."

A faint red glow reflected against the glass wall. Shinji was surprised to see Kaworu standing as well, his eyes shining.

"You should not say those kind of things when NERV employees can hear you." The other said softly, matching his pale hand to Shinji's with a distracted expression. Shinji blushed and pulled his hand away.

"Are you doing this?" He asked, gesturing to the darkness around them.

"No." Kaworu replied. "Although I admit it seems suspicious."

Shinji frowned. _I'm sick of not knowing anything._ He pulled the ID Rei gave him out of his pocket and pressed it against the glass. "Rei gave this to me." He said, watching Kaworu lean in and examine the card curiously. "Do you know why she would give this to me?"

"No." Kaworu answered again. "I am troubled by this. Shinji, you should not get involved—"

"Why?" Shinji shoved it back into its hiding place with a trembling hand. "Misato wants me to interrogate you, Rei wants me to search through NERV or something…I don't even know what my father wants." Shinji chomped down on his bottom lip. It hurt. "What—what do you want?"

"I want you to be happy."

The answer flowed so quickly through Kaworu's lips it nearly knocked Shinji off his feet. He staggered back, falling back into the chair. Kaworu's eyes never left him.

"Are you alright?" Kaworu asked, taking a careful seat.

"Do you really mean those things?" Shinji whispered, so soft a normal person wouldn't have been able to hear him, but Kaworu wasn't a normal person.

"What things?"

"That you care for me, and want me to be happy?" His heart beat erratically in his chest, the mere concept nearly impossible to accept or reject.

"Of course. You are so human, Shinji. I think that you are beautiful and the most deserving of love."

 _Love._

"It's not fair." Shinji whimpered again. The only one who seemed to care about him was locked away.

The lights flickered back on.

* * *

Kaworu sat at his piano, staring down at the white keys without really looking at them. He was intelligent, his thoughts all his own, the greatest thing mankind could ever achieve. He was created for a purpose. He was made for the new world, not this one.

Kaworu was programmed for this purpose in the beginning. And somewhere in his code he felt it tug at him with a ferocious necessity.

But TABRIS—Kaworu—was the greatest thing mankind could ever achieve. He was created for a purpose.

 _I was created for Shinji,_ he decided.


End file.
